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For the most part, the television set has been turned off for the past two days, except for tuning in to watch “Home Alone,” a movie that is destined to become a classic. There is something about repetition during the holidays that is comforting. For example, my (late) mother always served orange sherbet topped with cranberry juice, in a tall glass, and with a straw, and ice tea spoon, just like clockwork, every Thanksgiving and every Christmas. Even though we never had that treat at any other time, it is a wonder we didn’t, as it is so refreshing.

There are just so many traditions that my family adhered to, over the years, some of those lost with the passing of my own parents, and other customary habits changed for other reasons. When I was a child, my mother and I would take the bus and travel to downtown Manchester, New Hampshire to do last minute Christmas shopping. At that time, during the 1950s, the huge malls on the outskirts of town had not yet been built. We would go into department stores such as Leavitt’s, Pariseau’s, and Hill’s, and there was a wonderful hardware store called Moreau’s where mother would find all sorts of high quality dishes, china, and casserole dishes to buy as gifts. Most all of these little shops on Elm Street closed their doors, years ago.

With snow drifting down, on Christmas Eve, we would run into aunts who were picking up a few last minute gifts. We would stop at Woolworth’s Five and Dime store where one could actually buy a few things for a nickel or a dime. We’d go up to the soda fountain located at one end of the store, and have a hot fudge sundae. I can visualize the thick, creamy fudge, like no other, even to this day.

Ultimately, Christmas was about going to church. Often we attended Midnight Mass when I was old enough to stay up that late. My brother, Jack, was always eager for presents, and so, the family instituted a habit of each of us opening one present before leaving for church. The gifts were all very practical ones, as I recall, mainly clothing. Oh yes, I did receive dolls, ice skates, and toys, but the parents of four children wanted all of us to have warm flannel nightgowns, or new sweaters, or new flannel shirts, or new cozy socks, for the long winter. The emphasis was on giving, and the gifts were never measured as to who got more than someone else. Giving was done freely, and each gift was from the heart.

Zoom from the 1950s to today. What a sad day it was today. A temporary worker at Walmart was trampled to death for trying to hold back a mob of 200 would-be, crazed shoppers. A pregnant woman was injured in a similar circumstance. This shocking news is proof certain that the idea of Christmas has really gotten out of control. Is any material item worth killing a fellow human being, someone who will be missed by his loved ones during the holidays?

I can’t help but think of the simplicity of the first Christmas. If you are a Christian, then you believe that in a lone manger, the Prince of Peace came into this world on a starry night, and was laid on straw. Traveling from afar, the Wise Men arrived to pay homage to the Christ Child and to bring Him the gifts of incense, gold, and mryhh. Fast forward to 2008. Instead of giving gold in homage, the idea is for merchants to get as much gold as possible, by holding “sales” at impossible hours, such as 2 a.m., and by carrying only a limited number of advertised models so as to dupe the public into spending even more money by buying something more expensive.

There seems to be something inherently wrong, and just plain crazy about all of this. In trying to put more fun into Christmas with high tech and electronic items, people totally miss the point of celebrating the holiday in a more homespun sense. I really can’t explain the Spirit of Christmas to anyone else, as I perceive it to be. I can only say that something is fundamentally wrong with what is happening in America today. Since I can not change other people or the ways of the world, in general, I guess I will have to go work on my quilt. It’s the only option for maintaining sanity in an insane world. As I started to say, the essence of Christmas is love.

Patricia Cummings

Anyone who knows me, knows that I adore learning. My husband and I are lifelong learners, even though it has been years since we were sitting in classrooms to earn degrees.

Sometimes I wonder what people are learning these days, and even if anyone is learning anything anymore. That thought is based partially on the way that news reporters on television do not seem to know even the correct pronunciation of words.

Lately, so-called “educated” individuals cannot write well, cannot speak well, and cannot form sentences that are not disjointed, unconnected, and make one wonder what they are trying to say, anyhow. The most egregious example of someone who speaks in this way, consistently, has had enough press lately, so I need not provide a name.

I have never been a “hockey mom,” nor cavorted (for lack of a better word) with “Joe, the Plumber,” but I think that without too much trouble I might fall into the category of a quilt historian who is like a “Pitbull with lipstick on.”

There’s just one glitch in the analogy. I don’t usually wear lipstick. However, I do try to adhere to the truth, and I do care about the truth. I try to uphold the truth, even if telling the truth makes someone else uneasy, or rocks the proverbial boat, and even if what I say is misconstrued as not being “nice.” I have no interest in being “nice,” if “nice” means being quiet about someone’s falsehoods and errors. When the meadow muffins start piling up, it’s time to get out the shovel.

There are all sorts of lies: inadvertent misrepresentations, half-truths, lies of convenience, lies to cover up, lies because someone did not take the time to seek the truth (i.e. sloppy scholarship). No matter how you cut the mustard, these are all lies. If you are not telling the truth, then … you are telling a lie. Makes sense to me.

Having worn this subject thin, I will give it a rest, as full of disgust as I am at a particular situation involving misstatements. I will go “lie” in my bed, to ponder what makes people tick, before I count sheep with ticks. I guess a motivator for some individuals is money. Another motivator is social standing or prestige. I am just content with the truth, simple as I am. Now, is the truth really too much to ask?

Patricia Cummings

We all listen to advice via sound bites and maxims, and I am no different than the rest of the world. A while ago, the favorite saying of the day is that “Life is not a dress rehearsal.” In other words, life and our actions today are the only chance we have to “get it right.” We cannot back up the tapes of what we do, and re-shoot them in real life. However, “bad” tapes can replay themselves in our heads, for years.

Some of us follow other people whom we consider to be role models. In so doing, we can become very disenchanted and discouraged, when they let us down. Think of all the young people who idolize pop stars and music video stars, only to find them to drink irresponsibly or be morally corrupt. Think of adults who put their trust in government leaders and may even wish that they, too, could serve in that capacity. Then it is observed that some legislator is doing something terribly unethical or just plain wrong. The public balks at the bad news. Remember this: Tomorrow, any bad news will just be accepted and swept under the rug, as if an event had never happened.

As a society, we seem to be suffering from collective memory loss because we tend to engage in the same lack of judgment, again and again. When I see grown men in camouflage attire, running around in a foreign country, with an imbedded reporter, and one of the men gets hit by mortar or gun fire, it is not surprising that it is immediately confirmed that the soldier will not be coming home, at least not alive. These men are not “playing war” for a TV special, rather, they are living a daily nightmare that their number will be up next, not to step up to the luncheon meat counter at the store, but to meet St. Peter. Let’s hope they pass through the Pearly Gates with ease.

On a daily basis, we all make mistakes. If you keep forgetting to kiss your wife goodbye, a word to the wise, don’t. If you have not locked up your firearms yet, to keep them safe from youngsters, take care of the situation. Don’t take anyone else for granted. It’s not that they might die, it is that they will die, and so will you. It’s all a matter of timing.

The importance of life in all of its forms is often, for me, a poignant consideration, as it would be for anyone who stops to think about it, and particularly anyone who has a life-threatening condition.

So, if life is not a dress rehearsal, it means that we have to maximize our chances of taking the right course of action for ourselves, today. If you have been postponing a hard decision, make it. If you love people in your life, but never see them, make the effort. We will never walk down this road again, in the same way. Think of today as special because every today is a building block for tomorrow. Play for keeps.

Patricia Cummings

The rule of “status quo” is that there is no room for movement, growth, or change. The dictators of status quo would like everything to remain the same, with the same old rhetoric, the same old leaders (or those who agree with them), the same way of doing things.

Look to your own organizations. The leader of a group may be the best person for the job, and he/she remains in that post, sometimes until death. As a free society, we know that there are many groups and associations, most of them with a head honcho, grand “Poohbah,” or “great, white leader,” in an historical manner of speaking.

In societies, people are judged by their lineage, by the amount of money they have earned or inherited, and by the influence of their “clan.” In this age, we could construe the word “clan” to mean “extended family” that has been acquired because people substitute acquaintances for real family that has been “lost” in moves to distant states where money-making opportunities reside.

A lot of people might feel stuck in society’s overall view of who they are perceived to be. Education has always been a possibility for a step up the ladder. Historically, and I will use Spain as an example, one way to get ahead was to either become a priest, or join the military. And, the tradition of the latter has continued, there and here.

Young men are attracted to the military for many reasons. Some may join so that they can more easily get the training they need for the jobs they wish to hold, later in life, if they survive their tour(s) of duty. The military seems to be personally helpful to formerly undisciplined youth who never made a bed at home, but now MUST do so (at “work”). The military guarantees a paycheck, and work, unless someone makes some horrible mistake, is wounded, or fatally injured.

Where am I going with these thoughts? Well, let me back up a bit and mention a PBS special program called “Secrets of the Dead,” that I viewed last night. The show was about the fight by “the powers that be” to restrict the common man’s access to a version of the Bible in English, which was first written in Greek. The hour long show included a segment in which a dissenter and promoter of the English Bible was killed, but later exhumed, so that his body could be burned and his ashes spread in a non-Christian burial ground.

What is that all about, you say? Why would anyone do that? Seems radical. “The powers that be” had to make a further example of the man in hopes of dissuading anyone else from doing the things he had done, in life, that were considered to be so wrong. Power is at the root of the action.

Money, greed, and dominance equal power. The debates about power, and the misuse of it, probably reach back to a time we can only imagine: pre-recorded history. The debates and the struggles of man are often unchanged from century to century: the rights of self-governance, the right to make war, and what sacrifices will be required before we can make peace.

Yet, in our hearts, we all long for peace … except for the annoying neighbor, except for the co-worker who pulls our chain, except for the rest of our “enemies.” No, we speak of peace, but our tongues are swords, ready to go into action at the slightest hint of trespass of what we believe should be the maintained status quo. In other words, people are fine, as long as others go along with our set program, or follow (us) along like sheep going into the slaughter.

There may come a time of peace in the future. That may be when a nuclear holocaust has arrived, the war engine turbines have been silenced, and only ants continue to walk the earth. In the meantime, we live with our own delusions that everything is ok and will be ok. With any luck, we will continue to make some beautiful quilts to comfort our bodies and our souls, practically and visually, while we wait for the Generals and soldiers alike to put down their armaments that maim and kill living things.

Peacefully piece.

Pat

I have been listening to politicians again and a recurrent theme is the idea that if you throw money at a problem, (read the statement as “throw money down the tubes), then all will be well. I am here to tell you that there is no amount of money that can be spent in any educational system that will prevent “unwanted pregnancies.” Kids are foolish. It will never happen to them … they won’t get “caught.” In this case, raging hormones prevail. Teenagers should know better, but in the heat of the moment, they don’t act better.

We have all these buzz words swirling around Washington. One phrase, “No child left behind,” is a nightmare of a concept, in the opinions of most teachers who would rather teach content, than to teach to the test.

“Pork barrel spending” is another concept. The idea is to propose as much expensive legislation as possible, and then accuse your cohorts of too much involvement with spending that involves cronyism.

Like not being about to see the forest for the trees, we don’t examine the small impact of many interventions (questionable solutions?), that lead to a large impact.

And, women! I can’t tell you how many women I know who are indifferent to the political process and are not even registered voters. These people are casual acquaintances or I would read them the riot act about the fact that women did not gain the right to vote until 1920 and they should take advantage of the Right of Suffrage. Women can bring sensibility to the political process, as well as a sensitivity and accountability.

No, money is not the entire answer to any problem. For example, money will not bring better teachers into our schools. Teachers are either well-schooled, astute, and have the temperament for dealing with children, or they don’t. More money cannot change someone’s basic personality, nor their own responsibility for pursuing classes that will improve their professional functioning.

Last night’s debate made me nervous. Somehow, it struck me as disingenuous. McCain seemed to be glaring, seemingly in the attack mode. At times, Obama seemed to be broadly smiling for no particular reason, and hopefully not in derision of his opponent. He also did not answer a direction question about spending … at all. I was left with the wish that Mrs. Clinton had been given her party’s nomination, and I have the same sadness as I did when Al Gore did not win. The most able people are sometimes shoved aside in politics, perhaps never to run again.

I was more confident and hopeful before watching the last of the debates, last night. Like everyone else, we will have to wait and see, hope and pray, that the process will even out and the best man will remain standing. As for money being an answer for anything … ever … I believe that is a false notion. Having more money only makes the affluent more greedy and does nothing for the “little guy.” The politicians are right! There are no “trickle down” economics, unless you count a few more pennies in tips for restaurant workers. We continue to count down to November 4, and in the meantime, hope for the best.

Patricia Cummings

Some wise person once said that a lie can get half way around the world before the truth can get his pants on. This is not a blog about politicians, although it could be, in the last days of the election. This blog is not about the shysters would lie and cheat their way to the top. This blog is also not about grandiose, but mentally disturbed people, who tell lies about their abilities. One thing to remember is to never say that you are “fluent” in another language, when all you can do is to say “hello.” Once, I was tutoring a student in quilting when out of the blue, she told me that she was able to speak a long list of languages, one of them being Spanish. When I began speaking in Spanish, she drew a blank look and said that she “used to speak that one fluently.” Yes, and my pet pig is green.

Lies like that, meant to temporarily inflate one’s ego, don’t actually hurt anyone other than the liar himself/herself, it seems, but I have also learned that people who find it easy to tell any lie, also have no problem stealing, cheating, etc., in other words, living a life that is not even true to themselves.

Do you know the lies I despise the most? Falsehoods and fabrications about quilt history, when these are shared with a group, either online, in person, or in the media, including books. Lies do seem to “stick” more quickly, and often, no one challenges them because they come from the lips of an “expert.” Ha! That is a misnomer, in most cases.

Now, some people “mean well” when they blithely share their misinformation. In one instance, someone listed Kate Greenaway as still designing motifs in the 1930s, quite an achievement for someone who died in 1901. Of course, typos can come into play. Then again, we have a quilt that was reproduced, time and again, yet the “original” has never been seen, and its location is unknown (probably because it never existed in the first place?) – See my new book for more details.

Sometimes, information is misinterpreted, a common occurrence with us humans. We even misread each others’ intentions. The current political scene is a good example of that with the lady stating that she thinks Obama is not to be trusted because he is an Arab. Well, last I knew, an “Arab” was someone from Arabia who speaks Arabic. Even if he were, there are many law abiding, Arab-Americans, according to the media.

Of course, some remarks that are lies are intentionally made by people who want to try to gain the upper hand, by small minded toads, and by others who want to damage someone’s reputation. No matter what the reason is for lying, there is no sufficient justification. In the case of politics, the means do not justify the end.

I hope that in politics and in the rest of life, we can begin to concentrate on what is good about each other. The less attention given to the negatives, the better. I just hope that people who should know better, will begin to take extraordinary care when they impart information. After all, who would want to hear, “Liar, liar, pants on fire,” or worse yet, be caught with their pants down?

Patricia Cummings

Let me preface this by saying that I rarely watch television. The exception is the News. However, last season I was intrigued by the show, “The Office.” I was looking forward to the new season because I liked various story lines.

What a disappointment with that show, and the one preceding it, “Earl.” Last night, both shows had the need to portray women as involved in extramarital affairs or illicit activities. In the later case, Earl’s father’s neighbor moved away because he felt guilty after he helped himself to Earl’s father’s wife, apparently with her urging and full consent.

Back at “The Office,” the Boss’s ex-girlfriend is expecting a baby and when she shows up at the workplace, he rubs her belly, crooning, “Who’s Your Daddy?”

In another scene, one of the “girls” has become engaged to a co-worker, and while he is busy trying to plan some wonderful honeymoon trip, somehow she keeps wandering downstairs to hang out in the closet with her ex-boyfriend, another co-worker, admonishing him each time that it will be the “last.” She explains, “I really like my fiance.”

There is something about these shows that is very disturbing in a moral sense. Based on these productions, we could ask if Americans have any moral fiber left. And, furthermore, if these images bother a middle-aged woman, like me, what effect are they having on young people who watch this irresponsible behavior? I mean, if you don’t know who the father of your baby is, you’ve been cavorting with a few too many boyfriends, don’t you think?

We always come back to the age old question:  Does art portray life, or is it an exaggeration? In this arena, of so-called humor, are the scenes supposed to be (sickening) funny, the more disgusting the better?

Last night, when “The Office,” was not being gross, or the characters not being crudely insulting of each other, (one calling another, “retarded,”) then, there was some other unsettling scenes. One I did not appreciate was when a new girl said she didn’t want to go out with a guy because she preferred women … but then said, that she had lied. You know, I never heard about “gays,” growing up, and I was the happier for it. Now, the idea is crammed down our throats everywhere we turn, and especially in the media. Sorry, I see no reason for “pride.”

Finally, I had to turn off the TV after one of the characters, who was on an enforced diet, by the boss, fell off the scale upon which all of her co-workers were involved in their weekly weigh-in. She landed on the concrete warehouse floor and was lying in a pool of blood. That was enough! Somehow, I don’t think I’ll be tuning in next week. I could see nothing entertaining or culturally redeeming in either of the shows. At least with the News shows, the events actually happened and therefore, are believable.

Patricia Cummings